Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
