its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
