Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.