I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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