hell yes lets make some ravioli
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
