i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
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