he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
