I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
