Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
