I just saw a hot homeless man
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Randomize