I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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