i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize