Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
