Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
