no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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