1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize