Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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