giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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