I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
