I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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