Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
