then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself