Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
