I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize