and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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