Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Randomize
