She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
