Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
