I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
