Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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