She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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