On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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