Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(414): View more from Wisconsin

He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"

Fav 41 1072 5196
share tweet
(559): View more from California

So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best

(310): View more from California

and??

(559): View more from California

Cake is only good when you eat it

Fav 19 1172 4583
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(847): View more from Illinois

you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.

Fav 25 13390 1577
share tweet
(405): View more from Oklahoma

It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.

Fav 15 1196 3722
share tweet
These 25 Rude People Ruined Movies for Everyone Else
Read it at the TFLN blog
(530): View more from California

regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle

Fav 10 3781 2134
share tweet
(859): View more from Kentucky

the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.

Fav 9 2171 2428
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(515): View more from Iowa

We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.

Fav 3 2456 1202
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(602): View more from Arizona

Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend

Fav 4 505 870
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(708): View more from Illinois

I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store

Fav 1 352 117
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT