wat bout pragnant strippers??
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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