You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
