Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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