Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize