love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
