i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
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