I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
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Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
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I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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