you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
