oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
