gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
