So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
