once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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