I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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