After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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