HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Someone came in the potted fern
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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