Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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