if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
